Few Relationship In Earth Never Die
FRIENDS. They are often the first person you run to when you have problems, when you feel so wasted, when just wanted to scream your anxiety or you feel these extreme happiness. We claim them as our brothers and sisters from other womb. They are the few people we choose from the sea of people for we know they are best persons that fits us. They reflect our personality. They are part of us, our system.
I can consider myself to be having yes, many friends, but let me tell you, i carefully chose them. I consider them rare, the diamonds among the stones. They stood out from the crowd. They are not just another people in my life, they are more like family to me.
I want to fathom every thought I have, cant fully scribble every inch of emotions I am feeling right now, and I consider writing this down would just be a remedy for I can’t find anyone to tell these to. I want to consider few people who would understand this dilemma. Some people might find this as over reacting but for me I guess this is just completely normal. And I am trying fix this dilemma for few weeks now.
I am missing these people, yes I terribly miss them. Every day is a blessing, but sometime I feel like it is cursing me. It is burning me. How hard can it be to spend the whole day with people few inches from you but felt like your miles away from each other? Or am I just over reacting again? That awkward feeling every time I try to talk to them, that distant emotion, those colds words. I am feeling severely different, I just want to have this okay-fine-feeling and that it-is-just-normal or just-be-used-to-it-feeling every day I am with them. I want to bring back the old us, the old kind of friendship we shared, but due to some course of events, I find doing that close to impossible. I want to be more positive and mature in dealing with these situation but I can’t seem to act like one.
I am just seeking for their understanding, i guess they did understand me, but I cant understand why do i have to feel and undergo these rough turn of events. I am sorry for that thing I did. And I guess since none of them can read these, it would still be impossible to change the course we are tracking now. I just need to gather inside strength to tell these to them, and hopefully in time, in the rightest time possible, I will.
and I want to let them know that I cared and I am affected.